I'm sorry I haven't updated in a looong while. These last couple weeks have just flown by sooo fast. It seems like just yesterday was our midway retreat. Anyways, I'm sitting here with Alinafe Kwilimbe and we were just chatting.
I don't really know what to say right now, because I'm still processing everything. But these few weeks were the hardest weeks I've been through. Everyday was just so emotionally and mentally draining. I specifically remember last wednesday when I went to Chitipi (one of COTN's orphan homes) I felt like I was going to burst into tears at any second. (Haha, I just asked Alinafe what I should write and she said this: "I don't know what to say because i'm so sad right now") It's not that I'm sad that I'm leaving Malawi, but more of because I'm leaving the people I've come to know and love, the kids, and the lifestyle.
It's so frustrating because I'm trying to grasp the words for the events that are replaying over and over again in my mind. So I'm just going to write about the most recent event which is yesterday and we'll work our way backwards.
Yesterday was the last day of ministry in Mgwayi. We've given our time, our hearts, our tears, sweat, anything and everything in that village, in those kids. It was just so hard to say goodbye because we've poured every last drop we had. But something that really touched me was during outreach. So I mentioned in my last post about those people who terrorized the villages by scaring little kids. It just so happened that they came yesterday. All of a sudden, the kids just stopped what they were doing and a wave of fear just came over the field. They were screaming and running away and I don't think I've ever seen such fear in these kids before. That was when I realized that these kids don't go without a day of feeling fear whether it be of those people, of hyenas, or of hunger and sickness. To go through that constant fear as a child is so traumatizing and to have that fear be the norm is just, unimaginable to me. They are so strong, and they don't even know it.
Anyways, as the kids were running and crying, Chifuniro (I guess you can call him my favorite little boy, even though we're not supposd to have favorites) called out to this little crying boy in front of me, took his hand, and told him to hold my hand. Then he started to wipe the tears off his face. At that moment, my heart just felt so full and so warm. He's only about 5 years old, yet he's so mature. It's amazing to witness these kids share God's love to one another. And that's when I knew that I had atleast accomplished something. I don't know. I'm still processing everything. But that's just half of what happened yesterday.
I wish I could write more, but it would take me probably a whole day or two to give you all a full update. But I just want you to know that I'm hanging in there. All the interns are heading out to the Lake on Monday. I know these few days are going to be the hardest. I just pray that God prepares our hearts for home and for everything we're about to face.
Don't, worry though, I will give you the full update and then some when I have time! Promise!
Love, Love, Love,
Angela Wu
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